Scenes from Inspire & Restore 2019!

Just thought I’d share some of what happened on our Inspire & Restore Retreat this year today!

Heather and I arrived with a VERY FULL car in a gently falling snow! Heather demonstrated just how full:

Last year there was no snow, this year there was plenty!

Our first practice in the South Lobby was a wonderful way to shake off the travel and begin our time together:

Heather started the real love fest off with some gentle assists during Shavasana our first night:

Angel cards gave us all a little message for our time together. This one was mine:

Sunrise the next morning was stunning on the freshly fallen snow:

The view from our practice space never ceases to amaze:

Everyone’s items placed on our group altar for the retreat:

I was very grateful for the loan of some snowshoes while we were there so I could try them out. It was cold but an amazing day to get outside for a bit:

Someone caught me taking pictures while I was out there. You can tell it’s me because of all the BLUE!:

Everyone worked hard during our morning vinyasa practices with me:

And were ready to rest well during the evening restorative sessions with Heather:

The outdoor hot tub is always a highlight for me, even if the walk to and from is a little bracing!

The food was amazing this year! Couldn’t resist a picture of this Maple Creme brûlée!

We already can’t wait for next year! Save the dates! January 26th-29th, 2020!

Don't Quit on a Bad Day!

As many of you know, I’ve gotten a bit more into hiking in the last couple of years. With an amazing state to live in like NH, it’s not hard to see why! I’ve been fascinated by the Appalachian Trail for years, which just happens to run through our beautiful state. In the context of our focus on Patience this month, I’ve been really struck by one bit of advice often given to people that are attempting to hike the whole trail.

If you aren’t familiar with it at all, the Appalachian trail begins in Georgia and runs up the east coast all the way to Maine. The part that runs through NH starts in Hanover and makes its way through the White Mountains, giving it a well deserved reputation for being some of the hardest miles on the trail. Just the idea of thru hiking this 2000+ mile footpath is daunting. Most people who attempt it start in February or March and end their journey in Maine sometime in September or October, hoping that the weather cooperates enough to allow a safe and snowless passage to the northern terminus on Mount Katahdin in Baxter State Park.

For those keeping score, that’s about six months of walking through all kinds of weather with somewhere in the neighborhood of (for most people) 30-50 pounds of gear on your back. No small undertaking!

Needless to say, there are a lot of people that don’t make it the whole way. In fact, 1 in 4 that start don’t make it to the end. There are many reasons people pack it in and go home. I can only imagine when it’s raining, cold, you’re sore all over, you’ve got very little food left in your pack and you have to climb one more hill before you can finish for the day, every cell of your being must scream, “Why the *(#$&# am I doing this?!” Nevermind, having some kind of injury.

But the advice I keep seeing offered to the people that are thinking they can’t make it over and over again is, “Don’t quit on a bad day!” Interesting, right? Don’t most of us quit when things are at their worst? When we just can’t go one more (proverbial or otherwise) mile? When things look so bleak we just can’t fathom continuing or muster the energy to do so?

But consider the idea of waiting for a “good day”. In the case of the trail, you wait until the weather is beautiful, you’ve got a belly full of food, maybe a beautiful view, some nice people surrounding you and your body feels pretty good. You’re making progress, you’re dry and comfortable and then and only then, if you still want to go home and end your epic undertaking, you go home.

In my mind, that really speaks to patience and trust.

The patience to see yourself through until that good day comes is paired with the trust of knowing that the sun will shine again. If you didn’t trust the clouds would part, you would never be able to wait long enough to see it happen.

In our yoga practice, when we focus on the breath, we let go of our exhales only because we know that the next breath is right there waiting for us. If we didn’t have that trust how could we release our breath? We trust that some day we might make it into that difficult pose we’re trying to master. Through that trust we are able to bring ourselves back to the mat over and over and over again.

So maybe the next time you’re ready to throw in the proverbial towel, you think about all those people out there who are walking from Georgia to Maine and remember this great wisdom. Maybe you cultivate the patience and trust to remember that when the sun shines again, that might be the best time to make that big decision. The view from on top of that sunny hill will be far more clear and help you make the best decision possible.

[Incidentally, someone in our own back yard is going to attempt a thru hike in 2019! Best wishes to Sara Hikes! I’ll definitely be cheering you on!]

How Yoga Can Help Us Cultivate Patience

In all my classes this month we’re focusing on Patience. Look around you and you will no doubt have noticed that this is a quality in short supply in our world and culture lately. When we can press a button and have whatever we want delivered to the trunk of our car in moments, it’s not hard to see why! However, you may also have noticed that there are still many things in life that simply aren’t instantaneous. Here’s how your practice might help you cultivate patience when you need it most.

If you look in a dictionary you’ll find the definition of patience to be something like, “The capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.” I find that an interesting definition, perhaps because of my own relationship with the word (or maybe it’s my yoga practice). Sure, that may be the ultimate goal; that whatever is delayed or troubling or causing suffering becomes so easy to accept that the emotion of anger or “upset” doesn’t even arise. I don’t know about you, but I’m not there yet!

Recently, my father was experiencing a pressing health problem that required a referral to a specialist. For reasons that are still beyond my comprehension, his doctor’s office was unable to send a simple fax to the office of the specialist for nearly two weeks. He lives over 4 hours away from me so there was little I could do to intervene. Even with the distance, it was quite obvious to me that he was certainly suffering. If you think I didn’t get angry, both for my inability to do something to relieve his suffering and for the incompetence of the staff at his doctor’s office, you’d be sorely mistaken.

But thanks to doing things like holding Utkatasana for more than a single breath, I was able to notice the anger rising and instead of acting on it by calling his doctor’s office and screaming at people to do their [bleeping] jobs (which probably wouldn’t have been very effective) I was able to listen to him and come up with other ideas of places he could turn or ways to deal with the problem. Yoga can teach us that the feelings will rise but we need not act on them immediately.

If that sounds like a simple or silly thing, listen to the stories of the incarcerated, who often wish they could take a single moment of anger back. Think about the time you said that thing to that person who was never able to forgive you. Knowing that our emotions will come and go and having the capacity to be with them and know that they will pass is a huge skill. When we can create that kind of space, we give ourselves the opportunity to respond (with clarity and intention and maybe even kindness) rather than react. Will that happen every time? No. It certainly doesn’t for me. I’m still human. Just ask me what I do the next time my husband forgets to take the trash out for the 9 millionth time. ;-) But over time and with practice, our capacity can grow, and our tolerance can grow.

So to me, I might re-write that definition to read, “The capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without acting on our anger or upset.”

That word capacity is a big one. How big is our capacity to hold this moment, no matter what the quality of the moment might be?

Think about the happiest day of your life. What do you actually remember in detail? Especially if it was a long time ago, what has stayed with you? Now imagine if you hadn’t had the capacity to be in that moment. What if you had been rushing on to the next thing? What might you have missed? What if your capacity to be present with that day or time had been greater? What might you still be able to recall that isn’t possible now?

In our yoga practice we constantly draw our attention back to the present moment. We do that by feeling sensations in the body, by focusing our attention on our breath, or in many other ways. It is the nature of our mind to think and take us away from the present moment, most especially if that moment isn’t comfortable. But when we continually draw our minds back to sensation and back to breath throughout our practice, we’re training the mind to stay with the moment, even when the moment is difficult, whether that difficulty is the sensation of the muscles working hard to hold a position or the emotions or thoughts rising that we wish were different or non-existent.

Think about those moments when you’re trying to achieve a difficult pose in your practice. Often, it doesn’t happen overnight. It takes repetition, concentration, practice (notice they don’t call it a “yoga perfect”!). How many times will you have to do headstand before you can hold it away from the wall without a spotter? I don’t know. Neither do you. Talk about developing your capacity to accept or tolerate delay! That same “not knowing” that comes with trying to achieve a difficult pose, is the same “not knowing” that comes when you’re waiting for a doctor’s office to send a fax. Your ability to practice being with the not knowing on your mat helps you develop your capacity to be with it when it happens in your life.

Then there’s that bit about acceptance or tolerance. Learning acceptance or tolerance can be the key to staying present in the most difficult moments of life. When your friend calls you to tell you they need a shoulder to cry on, do you listen to them fully or do you check your email while they’re talking? The last time you were experiencing suffering of your own and someone truly was there to listen to you, how did that make you feel? Being with ourselves or the people we love in those difficult moments is so hard. Being with my father while he was in a great deal of pain recently was definitely difficult. No one wants to suffer, and no one wants to see someone they love suffer. But to give yourself or someone you love the gift of your presence in those challenging moments is so amazing. Being able to accept this moment as it is, no matter how difficult and trust that it will change, sooner or later, is another ability we can grow in our yoga practice.

No one wants to be alone when they are suffering. So as we develop our tolerance of those poses that aren’t our favorites or the acceptance that yes, she’s going to make us chant that mantra again, we grow our capacity for all of life. We get to be present for all of life. We get to be present for those we care for and love. We get to express our love and care by giving that person, even in their most difficult moments, the gift of our full attention. A gift that again, seems so rare these days. We’re more able to hold the not so great moments and the great ones for ourselves and others, so we can actually experience all of what life has to offer, rather than letting it pass us by. We can accept that it won’t all be perfect and it won’t all be pleasant, and by accepting that, we have a much greater chance of really experiencing the great moments to their fullest.

Life is short. I’d much rather live in capacity, tolerance, acceptance and presence, so I think I’ll keep practicing. How about you?

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3 Big Ideas for Improving Your Utkatasana

Utkatasana or chair pose can be a challenge because it asks us for strength throughout our legs and, by extension, our core. Given that most people that come to yoga are interested in (and if we’re being honest, better at) flexibility this can be a challenge and doesn’t exactly put this pose in the category of favorites. But if you’re interested in balance in all things, you’ll want to include this posture. How can we become better friends with this pose? Here are some thoughts.

Check your stance and position but don’t make it a habit to do so! An important aspect of this posture is moving our hips behind our ankles. Doing so keeps strain from happening in our knees because we are keeping the knees from going past the toes. You may notice in class I often don’t even call out the pose name, but rather ask you to move the sit bones back to call attention to this important aspect of the posture. As beginners (and even beyond), once we enter the pose we’re often told to take a look down and make sure we can see the toes beyond the knees. This is a good way to start to develop our understanding of the posture. However, once you know the pose, check in now and then, but don’t do it every time you do the posture! Really being able to feel our bodies in space is an important aspect of developing our practice. You’ll also be breaking the line of your spine and effectively taking your weight forward rather than back when you look down (and possibly creating other issues. The human heads weight a lot!). And in our modern world, we want to focus on strengthening that back body line rather than continuing to over stretch it as we so often do.

Work the legs independently and create less strain in the outer hips by taking a wider stance. If you’ve been practicing yoga for a fair length of time and depending on the tradition you studied in, tadasana and utkasana were often taught with the big toes touching or even the inner line of the feet totally together like so.

The next time you come into the pose like that, take a moment to really feel what’s happening in the legs and hips. Perhaps you’ll feel fine and strong and that’s great! Every body is different. For me and my frame and the majority of the people I work with, it’s just too narrow. As I like to joke, this practice was invented by skinny little Indian men. I am not that! So what I find is that a wider stance (sit bones distance apart, not hip width which I think would be taking it too far) creates less strain in my outer hips and makes me use the muscles of my legs more, which is in keeping with the strengthening aspect of the pose.

With my feet closer my knees can fall into each other so I end up squeezing them together rather than creating an isometric contraction in the totality of my leg muscles (that feeling of hugging the muscles to the bones). That feeling of the knees falling in toward each other creates strain in my outer hips, because the muscles there are trying to hold my spine up, rather than the legs helping the engagement through the core. Essentially, the strengthening benefit from the posture is gone.

But again, your milage may vary.

Finally, when moving through a common twisting sequence in this pose, pay attention to actually coming back to where you were in between each twist. We can find a great combination of flexibility and strength by bringing a twist into our utkatasana. The twisting action can help relieve tension in the spinal muscles that may have accumulated throughout our busy days. Where we get into trouble here is when we don’t fully engage between twists, letting the torso stay in a forward position rather than coming back to the full spinal height of the pose. Hopefully this image makes this a little more clear:

Didn’t mean for this one to get so psychedelic but hopefully you get the idea!

As you can see from the layering of these two images, the “lazy utkasana” brings the torso in front of where it might be if I’d been coming into the pose from Tadasana. My belly is practically resting on my thighs which probably means I’m not using my core to support my spine and missing out on the strengthening aspect of the pose again.

To make this more clear, here’s a short video of this twisting sequence. You’ll see me move into the twist and the first time I’ll lift the torso back to where it was when I first came into utkatasana, the second time I won’t so you can see the difference.

Now it’s your turn! Let me know which of these ideas you found most valuable for improving your Utkatasana. And while you may never love this pose, the next time you have to use a public toilet or pee in the woods, you might just thank me! ;-)

Exercising Barefoot

To a yoga practitioner, exercising barefoot is a matter of course. It helps keep us from sliding around on the mat, gives us better connection to the earth and creates more flexibility and strength in our feet. We probably don’t even think about the fact that we’re doing something that you don’t typically do in most other forms of exercise. But have you considered that you might be able to find benefits from being barefoot in other forms of exercise? Learn more with today’s guest blogger, Laurie Gouley, Creator of The Dalai Nala!

Have you ever exercised barefoot? You may be thinking, with all the super cool sneakers on the market that "support your arches" or "absorb impact" why would we ever workout barefoot? But that is exactly why we should workout barefoot. Wearing those fancy shoes have made our feet and ankles weak.

Of course going barefoot is not for everyone. If you have diabetes, open sores, numbness in your feet, a contagious foot disease or poor circulation, going barefoot is really not recommended.

However, most of us learned how to walk barefoot and spent lots of time as a child barefoot. We have grown accustomed to shoes but it is a very liberating feeling to be without shoes. It's so freeing!

Think about when you were small and outside barefoot in the grass. How did it make you feel? When I remember that, I get a happy feeling. There is an actual name for this! It's called, earthing. Earthing means walking barefoot on soil, grass or sand (meaning: any natural surface). Sorry this doesn't include sidewalks. :)

A review published in the Journal of Environmental and Public Health looked at a number of studies that highlight how drawing electrons from the earth improves health. In one, chronic pain patients using grounded carbon fiber mattresses slept better and experienced less pain.

Another study found that earthing changed the electrical activity in the brain, as measured by electroencephalograms. Still other research found that grounding benefited skin conductivity, moderated heart rate variability, improved glucose regulation, reduced stress and boosted immunity.

One particularly compelling investigation, published in The Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, found that earthing increases the surface charge of red blood cells. As a result, the cells avoid clumping, which decreases blood viscosity. High viscosity is a significant factor in heart disease, which is why so many people take blood thinning aspirin each day to improve their heart health. Another study in the same journal found that earthing may help regulate both the endocrine and nervous systems.

Most shoes act as a crutch, thus contributing to foot and ankle dysfunction.

Going barefoot improves bio-mechanics, strengthens the foot (ligaments, tendons and muscles), lengthens the Achilles tendon, and enhances coordination and balance. Going barefoot strengthens the stabilizing muscles of the foot and ankle and makes them stronger. It us true that shoes give a lot of stability and support, however, this is what makes the foot and ankle lazy. Strengthening the small stabilizing muscles of the feet can improve our balance and overall sports performance. Improving foot and ankle function will do wonders for movement mechanics, particularly in the hips and lower torso.

Going barefoot can improve our proprioception. Proprioceptors are sensors that provide information about joint angle, muscle length, and muscle tension, which is integrated to give information about the position of the limb in space. The way that we can tell that an arm is raised above our head, even when our eyes are closed, is an example of proprioception.

Going barefoot helps us to feel and connect us to our environment and this helps our balance and develops our natural movements. While it may seem the padding of shoes will reduce the impact on your feet and legs, in fact it may increase it since your proprioceptive system depends on feedback to adjust to impact and the padding can cause you to impact harder to activate it.

No stinkies! Bare feet do not naturally stink. The sweat glands in the feet are just like the sweat glands in the hands. Feet will only stink after being cooped up in shoes for hours.

Benefits for athletes! Athletes who train barefoot have amazing results and experience fewer injuries. No matter how strong, powerful, mobile, agile, fast, or explosive an athlete is, correcting these foot and ankle deficiencies will only improve upon their pre-existing bio-motor capabilities as well as reduce their risk for injuries.

(There are 5 bio-motor abilities. They are strength, endurance, speed, flexibility, and balance or coordination.)

An example why doing a lunge bare foot is better - To properly perform any variation of a lunge (front, reverse, walking, or lateral), first and foremost, you need balance. Performing them barefoot allows you to grip the floor with your entire foot—your toes, the balls of your feet, and your heels—for maximum stability. A sneaker would impede that ability.

While there are many benefits of going barefoot; don't just jump right in with both feet. :)

Train up to it just like you would with anything. After all we spend most of our lives in shoes now so our feet and ankles have weakened! Slowly transition. Your feet will be tender for awhile, so don’t do a whole workout right away.

Give your feet time to adjust. Begin with a barefoot warm-up for a couple of weeks. Slowly increase the number of exercises or drills you do without sneakers. If your gym doesn’t condone barefoot training, try minimalist footwear.

Take your shoes off when you’re in your house or sitting at your desk, too. You can also roll a tennis ball under your arch, and flex and point your toes to strengthen all the muscles in your feet.

I’m a huge believer in barefoot training just for the foot-strengthening and injury-prevention benefits alone!

"But, what if I drop a weight, Laurie?!"

Let's face it...if you are worried about a weight dropping on your foot, your sneaker is not going to do much to save you. Either way it will suck if that happens. So use caution. :)

If you're unable to perform a majority of your activities in barefoot or minimalist conditions, then you have foot and ankle deficiencies. Your feet & ankles will need to be re-trained. I will say it again, if you'd like to start barefoot training, ease into it slowly. The feet, ankles, and toes need to be trained just like any other body part. In fact, you could easily say they require greater emphasis considering most individuals wear shoes that limit, constrict, and bind their feet in unnatural positions, ultimately promoting dysfunction of the lower extremity.

Do you have blisters, corns, ingrown toenails, bunions, skin irritations of the feet, and calluses? Most of these can be traced back to either poor footwear, improper foot and ankle mechanics, or a combination. Most of these are a result of placing uneven pressure on various locations of the feet, a common result of faulty foot mechanics.

But remember whether you choose to workout with shoes or not, be sure to pay attention to any signs of discomfort in your toes, arches, heels, or ankles, and consult your physician if you feel abnormal pain or discomfort.

Do you dare to go bare?

Thank you Laurie! Check out the original posting here.

The definition of insanity...

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result. As far as I can tell, by that measure that means most of us are bat sh*t crazy! LOL! In all seriousness, I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Many of us have things we’d like to change in our lives. I know I do! But how many of us actually take positive steps forward to create those changes without getting overwhelmed by the seeming enormity of the task or just don’t even bother getting started in the first place?

If we want to loose weight we suddenly think we’re going to start on a specific date and completely change our diet or start an entirely new exercise program. And then by the second week or so we’re off the wagon and wondering where the days have gone. We end up feeling like change is impossible and give up.

If we want to change something in a relationship we sit down and have that Come to Jesus talk with the other person, lay out everything that’s wrong, agree to change and then realize a week or two later that we’ve fallen back into the same habits with that person again. We feel like change is impossible and give up, only to be unhappy and perhaps have another emotional explosion come again in the future.

If we just don’t feel great maybe we decide to start a meditation practice because we heard that would be good for us. So we sit down and try to do 20 minutes the first time out, end up looking at the timer approximately 3 billion times in the first 5 minutes and then think we just can’t do meditation and give up on ourselves.

Any of this sound familiar?

Yeah. Me too. But if the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result, but then we try and make some change and it “doesn’t work”, what is there to do?

We live in world where we’ve been conditioned to think we can just “fix it” right now. We can take a pill and everything will be all better. We want instant results. We want instant change.

But when was the last time that actually happened? Even if you have something you need to take an antibiotic for, it takes several days for that antibiotic to work! You aren’t cured instantly.

When you take that antibiotic you are doing one small thing, very consistently for a short period of time and then you measure the results. Maybe you take that pill once or twice a day. That probably takes you about 30 seconds. You do that for five days and then you measure the results. If all is well, great! If not, you go back to the doctor.

What if we applied this idea to the big changes we want to make in our lives? What if instead of changing our whole diet we picked something small like eating an extra serving of vegetables at dinner each night for a week and then noticed the change that created? What if instead of trying to change our whole relationship overnight we just chose to speak to them kindly when they forgot to take the trash out again instead of yelling about it and then ask that person how they felt at the end of the week? What if instead of trying to do 20 minutes of meditation every day we started with 1 minute 4 days this week and then wrote down how we felt after each session to see if there was improvement?

It takes time to see change. We can start without doing everything at once. And if we check in with ourselves consistently, we can see that these small acts start to pile up. It takes patience.

This month I want to encourage you to make a small change that will help you see that small changes can add up. I’m bringing back our annual gratitude challenge but in a shorter easier to manage format.

Starting today - grab a journal or a notebook and write down three things you’re grateful for each day. Do so every day through November 26th (that’s 21 days, which some studies show is what it takes to start a new habit). Show it to me by December 1st and you’ll get a little prize (you can leave it at the studio with your teacher if you won’t be able to see me during that time). This may seem like a small practice, but it can really make a big change in the way you see the world.

I look forward to hearing about what you’re grateful for in the coming weeks!

Meditation: It’s a muscle we have to build and grow

There's a lot of conflicting information out there about meditation. The common misconception is that when you are really and truly meditating, your mind will be blank and you'll be free from all those crazy thoughts we all have day in and day out. While that's a lovely goal that some beings may be able to achieve, for most of us meditation is really more about the exercise of doing it. I like to think of it as a muscle you have to exercise, just like any other, in a way that's appropriate for that muscle.

The text below comes from an interview I did with the Monadnock Ledger-Transcript in 2016. You’ll find the original article here.

Q. We hear all the time that meditation is good for us. How exactly does it benefit one’s health?

A. The benefits of meditation are so vast that whole books have been filled on the subject! Meditation practice can have direct physiological and psychological effects such as the lowering of blood pressure, reduction in perceived stress level, relief of anxiety and depression, relief of temporary and chronic pain, improvement in the ability to concentrate and pay attention, and a general sense of greater well-being. Meditation is also shown by current scientific studies to be a key factor in the phenomenon known as neuroplasticity, where the brain, even at later stages of life, can actually rewire itself and create new pathways when needed. Meditation helps create pathways that can be beneficial to health, such as helping you stay the course with those New Year’s resolutions!  



Q. It seems there are as many techniques for meditating as there are yoga styles. How does one sort through the maze of options and get started?

A. That’s so true! It really can be overwhelming! But I’m reminded of a portion of the book “Be Here Now” by Ram Dass. He quotes the great Lao Tsu, who said, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” He then asks, “But where do we begin? The answer is simple: You begin just where you are.” Do you see mention of a technique somewhere that appeals to you? Give it a try! But don’t just try it once and decide it isn’t for you. Meditation, like so many things, is something that you have to build a relationship with. Choose a method, and commit to trying it for a week. If you’re new to meditation in general, start small. Even 2-5 minutes has been shown by many studies to start to bring about beneficial changes. Practice two to five minutes of your chosen technique for seven days, every single day and at the end of that time see how you feel. If it just isn’t working for you, try something else. If you aren’t sure, try another seven days. It’s more important to dive in and take that first step in giving it a try, than to agonize over the choice. You can always try again and you can always try something else. Once you find something that works for you, stick with it; 40 days is a traditional time period for committing to a practice. After that time you may want to try a different technique. Or maybe you’ll continue with the same technique. It’s all up to you! 



Q. It seems like the thoughts in the head are never-ending. How does one know they’re meditating?

A. This is such a great question because I think there’s so much confusion and mystery around meditation. That question of “how do I know if I’m there” is so prevalent. People think that meditation is this mystical place you only can get to if you have some kind of special gift and you can make your thoughts stop. I used to struggle with this so much early on in my yoga teaching career. I always thought, “I’m a yoga teacher for crying out loud! Why can’t I do this?!” And then I’d get frustrated and give up. Then I had the good fortune to meet a wonderful teacher named Sharon Salzburg and her workshop totally turned my relationship with meditation around. Here’s the thing — you can’t stop your thoughts. Your mind is meant to think! That’s what it was designed to do! What you can do, is bring the mind to a single point of focus. That’s what most meditation techniques are asking us to do. We use a technique — such as following the breath or my personal favorite, repeating a mantra — as a tool to help bring the mind to that single point of focus. The moment of meditation is that moment when you notice that you are not with that single point of focus any more. That moment that you notice that you’re actually thinking about how much laundry you have to do later or what’s on your to-do list for that afternoon or that argument that you had with your spouse yesterday — that moment is the moment of meditation. Because that moment is the moment when you have this amazing choice to make. You can either give up and tell yourself you’re terrible at this meditation thing and just go back to your day, or you can let go of whatever it was you were thinking about, and draw your mind back to your point of focus, i.e. your meditation technique. That’s it. That’s the whole game. When you keep noticing you’re gone and you keep drawing yourself back to your point of focus, that’s when you know you’re meditating.  



Q. What exactly happens when one is meditating?

A. What happens is that the process I described above goes on over and over again. Through that process, we start to train the mind to be here in this moment, rather than somewhere else. We develop the compassion to treat ourselves with love each time we release a thought to come back to our chosen technique. That’s a big one! Have you ever noticed how you speak to yourself? For most of us, it isn’t with love. We teach ourselves that we can always begin again. We corral that busy, busy mind that is always pulling us elsewhere, rather than being fully present in the moment. Maybe that doesn’t sound that profound, but when was the last time you actually paid attention to what you were eating, rather than talking on the phone, watching the TV, and checking your email? When’s the last time you actually sat with a loved one and fully heard what they had to say, rather than listening to, responding, or looking at Facebook? There are so many small but beautiful moments that we miss in life because we are being pulled in so many directions at once most days. Our lives are so hectic and so filled with anxiety. Meditation gives us a tool that helps us deal more skillfully with the challenges of daily life. It’s a muscle we have to build and grow like any other muscle. It takes practice, but it’s so worth it.  



Q. How did you get started meditating, and what motivates you to continue your practice?

A. I was never a meditator in the traditional sense until I started yoga teacher training where a traditional practice was a required part of my training. I think yoga was my meditation before that — and is certainly a valid form of meditation in and of itself. The process of linking breath and movement and becoming fully immersed in the sensations of the body was an entry point for me. Training to be a yoga teacher gave me more of a traditional practice. What motivates me to continue? So many things! I have so much to learn. Compared to some of the great spiritual teachers like the Dalai Llama, I’m just getting started! Who knows what else I may discover along the way. I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression since I was fairly young. As we move into the deep darkness of winter, that struggle becomes more difficult for me. My mediation practice has smoothed that bumpy road. It has made me less reactive, which makes me a better wife, daughter and friend. It’s also a professional commitment. I’m a better teacher if I can speak about the practice from a place of authentic experience. I hope to be a guide on the path for others who are struggling to begin like I did. It’s a key element in my spiritual practice as well.  



Q. Anything else you would add to this discussion?

A. I was once told by a teacher of mine that there was a study done that took brainwave scans of people while they were meditating. The scans showed the difference in brain waves when one was meditating versus when one was just going about daily life. One of the study participants told the scientists after one meditation session, “Don’t even bother looking at my scans for today. My mind was all over the place!” They decided to look at them anyway and were amazed to discover that even though the subject didn’t feel like they were meditating, the brain wave scan showed activity that indicated that the person was, in fact, meditating! I found that incredibly liberating! So, if you’ve tried meditation before and you gave up because you thought you weren’t “getting it,” try it again now that you’ve read what I’ve written here. Spend some time with it. Build a relationship with it. Give it a solid commitment of time. I think you’ll be glad you did.

The perfect breathing practice to relieve stress and anxiety

In all my classes this month we are focusing on our breathing. Breathing and yoga go together like bread and butter, but it can take a bit of practice to make it all work. The overall effect is a calmer mind and body when done well. While the breathing practice we try to maintain during a vinyasa practice, called ujayi breath, is wonderful calming breath, if you’re experiencing stress and anxiety there’s another one should should really consider practicing.

That breath is alternate nostril breath.

I often say I wish I had known about this breath when I was auditioning for orchestras when playing the bassoon was the career I thought I’d spend my life in. The anxiety of that experience always left me with shaky hands, a dry mouth and not much in the way of coping mechanisms to work with that bodily state other than taking more auditions. Now, I use this breath any time I’m experiencing stress or anxiety. The key though is to have an established practice. Only then will you remember to do it in your time of need.

Alternate nostril breath is said to balance the energy channels on the two sides of the body. Those energy channels just happen to coincide with our two nostrils. The right side is said to be the more energetic side, the left side is said to be the more calming side. By doing this breathing practice you are bringing those two sides into greater balance and harmony. The effect can often be felt after just a few repetitions.

Here’s how to practice this breath:

First, choose a hand position that works for you. I usually offer three different possibilities. The first is Vishnu mudra. The first two fingers are curled into your palm. You use your thumb and the last two fingers to alternately open and close the nostrils. It looks like this:

The second possibility is to instead take the first two fingers and anchor them at your third eye space or the space between your eyebrows. Just as above, the thumb and pinky fingers are then free to open and close the nostrils. That looks like this:

The third option is to just choose to do it however is most comfortable for you! That might look something like this:

Once you have a hand position that works for you you’ll then follow this sequence to perform this breathing practice (these instructions assume you are using your right hand):

1. Close the right nostril with your right thumb and inhale through the left nostril.

2. Immediately close the left nostril with your right ring finger and little finger, and at the same time remove your thumb from the right nostril, and exhale through this nostril.

3. Inhale through the right nostril. Immediately close the right nostril with your right thumb and exhale through the left nostril. This completes one full round.

You’ll continue this sequence for about 3-6 rounds to start. Allow the breathing to be slow and deep without being forced. Always end with the exhale through the left nostril (remember how we said this was the calming side above? That’s why. We want to end on a calm note!).

When you’re finished, take a few breaths through both nostrils and take the time to notice the effect of your practice.

If you are experiencing congestion or there is a blockage in the nostrils best not to try to do this breath. If you’ve been practicing it for a while, imagining it can be highly effective as well, but you first need to have an established practice.

You can practice this breath a couple times a day for a couple of rounds to start out. Over time as it becomes more comfortable, you can extend how many rounds you do at once. With time and practice you’ll notice a greater calming effect. You may also find this breath helpful in times when your energy is feeling low. The balancing quality of the breath works the other way as well.

Did you find this helpful? Do you practice this breath regularly? Do you have questions about this practice? Let me know in the comments!

Be here now

As I'm writing these words, a rough week for many of us has just come to an end. And not a very satisfying end. An end that has more of a question mark on it then ever. Many of us have been forced to relive our own traumas that we may have set aside for years. Many of us may have engaged in heated debates with friends or family members. Many of us are feeling worn out and dragged through the dirt thanks to media in many forms.

I don't care what side of the debate you stand on. What I care about is that you take care of yourself in the best way possible right now. One strategy I've been using and I'd like to offer to you is being fully present. How can that help in times like these? Read on.

This may seem like the exact WRONG time to be talking about being present. How do we do that when the present is just almost too much to bear? I’ve asked myself this question a lot this week. I’ve wondered how do I stay present with what’s happening, keep being an informed citizen and yet not loose my mind as I watch horrendous suffering come to the surface in others and old traumas rise in myself as well? How do I do any of this when all I really want to do is run and hide?

First, I have to know my limits. I am only human. I can do my best and my best has to be enough. My limits may not be the same as yours. I have to accept that. My limits may not be the same as those of my family and friends. I have to accept that and I have to call upon them to respect my limits and respond in ways that honor my boundaries. I may need to speak clearly about my limits to others. I may have to accept that they will not appreciate my limits. I will need to honor them anyway the best I can, perhaps without their help or support. No one else can know your limits. Only you can know where your boundaries are. Be clear in protecting your limits. And when you’ve reached that limit, turn off the TV, put down the paper or turn off or put away whatever it is that all this was coming to you through, or ask the person you’re talking to to allow you to change the subject or simply walk away. It’s more than ok to make it stop for awhile.

Second, I can use what I know about the brain and yoga/meditation to stop the repetitive loop of past traumas playing out in my mind. Did you know that when you relive a memory, your brain doesn’t know if it is something that happened in your past or if it is happening right now? Many times the same chemical responses, such as the release of stress hormones, can be found when we recall an event. If we end up in the endless thought loop of remembering a trauma, we are basically putting our bodies and minds through the same experience over and over again. Sometimes we need to do this to make sense of the event, to find resolution or to simply fully deal with the trauma. But sometimes we can get stuck in a pattern of thought that just becomes harmful. This is why knowing your limits is first. If it’s time to get those negative thought loops to stop, being present is where we begin.

How? Start as above in step one and turn off the news, put down the paper or the social media or whatever it is that’s triggering you. Choose a technique you find calming. Your technique might be similar to one you use in meditation. You can follow your breath, you can look at an uplifting image or you can repeat a mantra. Whatever you choose, bring your mind fully to it. See it, feel it, experience it for all that it is. The more curiosity you can bring to it the greater the chances of stopping the cycle of damaging thoughts.

But what does that really do? It empowers us to reclaim the here now. And the here and now is actually pretty safe if we really look at it closely. If you are reading this you are likely sitting at a computer or looking at a device. If you take a deep breath and let it out the next breath is going to come. And the next. There is no one attacking you. There is no one hurting you. You are just here, reading these words and taking a deep breath. It’s all pretty simple right here and right now. The next moment may not be that way. But this moment is. This breath is ok. This breath is safe. In this breath all is well.

So you take this little vacation from it all and you live and breathe to see another day. To take action in another moment. You are rested enough and centered enough to do whatever is next. And that is all anyone can ask in these crazy times we live in.

And if you truly need help processing and dealing with it all, remember that yoga and meditation can only take us so far sometimes. Don’t be afraid to call and ask for professional help. There’s no shame in that. That’s also part of knowing your limits.

Just begin again

Why is it that when we become adults and the older we get, we seem to think that we can’t start over or start something new? It’s as if we think when we get to {insert the milestone of your choice here} that we’re done! Cooked! Finito!

How ridiculous!

What we don’t realize is that there are new beginnings every day. When we start to recognize those new beginnings, we can start to see that the power to just begin lies within and that power is so very important in all aspects of our lives.

One of my favorite meditation teachers, Sharon Salzberg, shares great wisdom in the quote below that I shared in class and in your newsletter recently:

The critical element in meditation practice is beginning again. Everyone loses focus at times, everyone loses interest at times, and everyone gets distracted over and over again. What is essential, and also incredibly transforming, is realizing that we have the ability to begin again, without blaming or judging ourselves, without thinking we have failed, without losing heart, we can, and need to, constantly be beginning again.

Sharon Salzberg

This is so key in meditation, in yoga practice and in life. If you’ve ever started a meditation practice and thought you “failed” because you couldn’t get your mind to be quiet or empty, you’ve just discovered the importance of beginning again. (Stay tuned for more about this idea in a future workshop.) You also probably did a fair amount of beating yourself up in the process. I know I have!

“I suck at this.”

“I’m a freaking yoga teacher and I still can’t do this.”

“Why do I even bother.”

“Look at everyone else! They look so peaceful! Why is this so hard for me?!”

Sharon really changed my relationship with meditation the first time I took a workshop with her by bringing the wisdom of the quote above to my attention. Not only could I just start over, I could understand that I wasn’t alone in needing to do so. After over 40 years of meditation practice she does it too! That gave me great hope and a great deal more understanding.

That’s all well and good, but what does this have to do with your life you might ask.

When’s the last time you started trying to do something and gave up because you “failed”, or got busy with the daily requirements of your life or because your family needed you or {insert whatever it was here}?

• A new eating habit

• A new exercise program

• A new business

• A new educational pursuit

• Finding a new job

• A new way of being in an important relationship

• A new self care habit

• Etcetera …

We all do these things. But our practice of yoga and meditation can show us that we do have that ability to start over. We do it every time we get on our yoga mat. Every time you step on your mat is a new beginning. The body is different. The mind is different. The experiences of your life, no matter how small, have changed you. You really have no idea what you might find on your mat today. But you step on and you practice and you start again, and again and again.

Each breath is a new beginning. With great faith we take an inhale in and trust that it will nourish us. We let go of the exhalation with great trust that the next inhale will be waiting. Beginning again happens with every breath we take.

So we can start over. We can begin again. We do it multiple times each day.

What we might need even more practice with is the being kind to ourselves part. The not loosing heart part. The not judging or blaming ourselves part. And so we can get on our mat or our meditation cushion and practice that too. Notice when it happens. Know it happens to all of us. Then just let it go and start over. It’s just another thought.

Just begin again.